Unusual Stretches

More creative writing things. Promise it won’t be as long as yesterday’s. Today I will attempt to literalize(their word) phrases haphazardly put together.

Beauty visits once a year

There is this tree in my backyard. I don’t particularly like it. The thing has been there longer than this house my grandfather built all those years ago. Walt is the name we’ve given this tree. Walt spends most of the year without any leaves; it’s stopped trying at this point. The dusty brown exterior reminds me of a wooden desk that had water constantly spilled on it which to be fair…is true. Branches rise from the top and sides like hair being electrocuted which is also true. We should just put Walt out of it’s misery but the person who makes that decision would be exiled from the family. The tree is strong; generations of children have climbed the branches. Reading books, daring siblings to jump from ever higher heights, couples sharing romantic moments in it’s shadow. There really is only one actual reason we keep it. Once a year, right in September, Walt becomes the most beautiful thing in our quaint neighborhood. Leaves bloom only at the top for just a short time before they prepare to fall to the ground. A wonderful golden crown rests on its head and at 7:00 pm the sun hits Walt in such a way that it would appear to be glowing. 7:10. I shake my head and walk away from the window. That stupid tree will be there forever.

Bad news is the best medicine

She couldn’t sleep. The pain rushed throughout her entire body. Her feet burned while it felt like a machete sawed at her chest with each shallow breath.  The rare disease had taken her vision and ravaged her throat to where she couldn’t speak but only make slight whimpers. Her hearing was fine though. It’s been 7 months since she’s been this way. Completely dependent on a rotation of nurses that fight through exhaustion to try to keep their patient as close to comfort as they can manage. One of the nurses mentioned that it was Tuesday and a guest was here for her. The quaint female voice that spoke caused tears she had long believed had dried up. She listened as her mother explained the terrible news. There was nothing they could do. The doctors had tried everything but with the amount of pain she was in they would be taking her off of life support. Her mother wept as she spoke. The pain would be over and that is all that mattered. For different reasons both women cried.

Silence makes the heart grow fonder

He rocks back and forth in his chair as his wife putzes around in the office. Papers shuffle, pens are put back in the drawer and she finishes. Entering into the living room he sees his beautiful partner of thirty-four years shuffling to her favorite chair. His eyes follow her as she settles in. She is just as beautiful as the day he met her. Even the air tinged with her perfume still makes his face flush after all these years. He continued to look at her and she senses it. She tosses him a soft smile before returning her attention to the book she’d read at least a dozen times. That is where the real love is; the things understood but never said.

Strike while the head wears the crown

The best way to topple those in power is to head straight to the top. It’s also the hardest. Sure you can weed out potential evil while it is small and without much influence but that can be ineffectual. To make an indelible mark on society aim for he who wears the crown. Make an example out of the king to show that nobody is untouchable; the people will not stand for any wrongdoings. This will take time. Royalty is careful but do not dawdle for when the time is right it will already be too late. Do not let fear slow you down. Go boldly, yet tactfully and let your aim be true. Fire that bullet directly at the crown jewel and take back what is rightfully yours.

A rolling stone is worth two in a bush

Coach said that we have to keep the old head on the team. He’s slow but crafty and he’s forgotten more about this game than we could ever learn. Sure those twins are young and fast but there’s a possibility that they could suck. It’s such a hard decision. There is also the fact that he knows everything about all the other teams being such a journeyman. We could have little slices of insider info about our next opponent. How long until he’s off to another team though? What secrets will he carry to the next squad? There’s been talks of retirement but that happens every year. We’re in a “Win Now” situation and I think his veteran leadership will help us get over that hump. Just wish he was a bit more in shape.



Song of the day:



Ten Lists

Strap in boys, this gon’ be a long one

So I’ll be making ten lists of ten items that should shape my imagination, experiences and media consumption. At first when I saw this I figured this would be cake BUT I feel this may be way harder than I originally thought.

Ten movies, books, TV Shows or other media that have changed your life:

Sacred-Dennis Lehane.

9th Grade English. Our big project was a book report that we had to journal about every 30 or so pages. I couldn’t pick a book so my teacher, brought out a couple and I selected this one because the description seemed cool. Changed my entire life. It was the first adult book I’d read. It had drama, mystery, sex, murder, uncensored language that I was unaccustomed to in books. It set me on a path of inhaling books at top speed.

2. The Bible-Various Authors

Grew up in church. We read the Bible a ton. I can make references rather easily to the Bible and it’s something that has just been there my entire life.

3. I don’t remember the name of this book but it actually really influenced my decision not to join a frat in college. The book was about a kid that had died from hazing and how he haunted the frat. It also reinforced my fear of angels (THAT’S ANOTHER STORY) so I can say this work of fiction stuck with me and steered me on a specific path.

4. League of Legends-Riot Games

This game was introduced to me in 2009 and set in motion something kinda weird. I’ve poured HOURS into this game and occupied a ton of brain space with information regarding this game that I am somehow still absolutely trash at. I’ve made friends through this game and have also turned down social engagements just to play. Definitely life changing.

5. Insidious-2010 Horror film

I hate scary movies. In 2010, I tried to get over that fear with some friends. It confirmed that I hate scary movies and have no need to watch them. Ugh.

6. Game of Thrones-HBO

We didn’t have HBO growing up. I’ve never seen The Soprano’s or The Wire but Game of Thrones came out when I was in college. My roommates and I had missed the first and I think the second season so binged it. Like Sacred, it was the first show like that I had seen.

7. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy-Douglas Adams

I remember grabbing the anthology of the entire series and immediately immersing myself in this world. The creativity, the narration, the story, the absurdity was mind-blowing to me.

8. Series of Unfortunate Events

Brother introduced me to the series. Never read the first book but Lemony Snicket’s innovative style was something I had never seen before and I just started to expect more from authors.

9. “Lucky Seven”-Dave Holland Quintet

This song sent me into a hole of jazz that I’m grateful that I got buried in. Introduced me Nate Smith as well so that’s just a cherry on top.

10. Bedlam In Goliath-The Mars Volta

Talk about life changing. Bedlam in Goliath is the Worst scroll to the bottom.

Ten movies, books, TV Shows or other media that you actively hate:

This was way harder. I don’t cling to things that hate so some of this may be recency bias.

  1. Friday-Rebecca Black

This song was shockingly bad. I feel like it transcended into catchy again but I was still just so mad at it.

2. The Last Avatar-2010 “Movie”

Some things need to be left alone. This is the first time I’ve not finished a movie I voluntarily started. *Endless line of trash emojis*

3. The Cape-NBC

This show was so bad that to this day my dad makes fun of it. I just didn’t understand the purpose of its existence.

4. Dragonball GT

They introduced Pan and almost from the first episode I was out. She was unbearable so I stopped watching.

5. Hey Soul Sister-Train

Train is such a solid band but this song was so boring and grossly overplayed. I grew to detest it and would actively complained when I heard it.

6. Insidious-2010 Horror movie

See Above

7. Franklin The Turtle

Fuck this bitch ass, whiny reptile. If I find my rant on him on twitter I’ll post it but I tweet a lot so…

8. 13 Reasons Why-Netflix

I didn’t watch this so it’s hard to actually hate it but I’m adding it. So we’re glorifying suicide for drama and views…kys

9. New York-Alicia Keys and Jay-Z

Overplayed. It was everywhere. The chorus is boring. My roommate freshman year of college was from NY and the Yankees won the World Series. Perfect storm for me to never wanna hear that song again.

10. Iron Fist-Netflix

I have an obligation to watch all the Marvel stuff on Netflix but I just can’t get through this one. I have no reason to care about the characters. I actively dislike it.

Ten movies, books, TV Shows or other media that you loved as a child:

  1. Dr. Seuss-Author

Does this count? It’s not just one book, it’s the whole lot. He was brilliant. My brothers and I would rap them as we waited for mom to finish work at church.

2. Sesame Street-PBS

Oh, you didn’t watch a ton of Sesame Street as a child? Are you human? It’s the GOAT kids show and I loved it.

3. Wheel of Fortune-Game Show

It came on after Sesame St and before we went to church. It’s a classic game show and I grew up with it. Jeopardy was also great but we should have been out of the house by then and I grew to love it later.

4. Matilda-1996 Film

This movie had it all. Ms. Honey was one of my first crushes, Matilda was so cool and smart. Yeah, I love it.

5. The Lion King-1994 Film

Young kids aren’t supposed to be exposed to such emotion at a young age but the movie is damn near perfect. A perennial classic and I was swept up in the wave.

6. The Matrix-1999 Film

This movie changed the entire game for everyone. I was definitely too young to watch it but I think my brothers and I wore down my cousin until she let us watch it. Can you imagine watching The Matrix at 10 years old…whew.

7. Gospel Music

This is the music I grew up with. Despite not always wanting to hear about it all the time I grew an affinity to it. To this day, anytime I hear good gospel music I crack a little smile.

8. Captain Underpants

I was under 10, poop and pee jokes were my jam. Interactive books, wacky villains. Classic.

9.  Magic Tree House Series

I read so many of these books holy moly. They were so good at transporting you to another place. Filled with adventure and peril, the siblings were such a treat to travel with in their….Magic tree house.

10. Matt Christopher

I guess I’m ending this list how I began with an author. Christopher wrote books for boys about sports. That’s it. They were great. Well described action and themes we could behind. Recipe for success and I found myself always hunting for the next book or one I hadn’t read yet.

Make a list of ten stories only you can tell:

  1. The Comcast situation in 7th Grade
  2. First kiss with Marie also in 7th Grade
  3. Me smashing Samme Cramer’s toothpick bridge…also 7th grade
  4. Why we got yelled at in band after horrifically butchering the Star Wars theme.
  5. How I lost my virginity
  6. How I actually lost my virginity
  7. Falling in love in college and how that turned into a miserable failure
  8. Getting caught masturbating by my parents
  9. Getting that first big paycheck
  10. The traumatic experience of my childhood

Make a list of ten interesting, disturbing, or poignant images or scenes you see throughout your week:

  1. Homeless people
  2. My bank account
  3. My apartment
  4. My empty refridgerator
  5. Strangers on the bus
  6. Trump tweets
  7. World news
  8. People’s opinions on Twitter
  9. Genuine joy on a person’s face
  10. Racism in 2018

Make a list of ten mothers you’ve known in your life, excluding your own:

  1. Cheryl Fordham
  2. Jeannene Howard
  3. Joye Mann
  4. Lori Aulenbach
  5. Barbara Cantatore
  6. Latasha Stone
  7. Ms. Ison
  8. Xavier’s mom
  9. Leila McAdoo
  10. Kiana Freeman

Write down the first phone number you remembered memorizing, and then write ten images, moments, or scenes that come to mind afterwards:

717-939-1973 (Don’t call this, I don’t know who live there now)

  1. Plastic covers over the carpet.
  2. Sharing a bedroom
  3. Morning of my seizure
  4. Lucid dreaming
  5. Peeing the bed
  6. Day we thought someone had broken in
  7. Throwing up in the living room
  8. Getting a drum set for Christmas
  9. Skating through oil and the subsequent beatings
  10. Enema (story for a different day)

Make a list of ten daydreams you have or have had with any regularity:

  1. Financial comfort
  2. Physical fitness
  3. Driving
  4. Playing music full time
  5. Being the most powerful superhero of all time
  6. Suddenly coming into wealth and what I would do
  7. Being able to break down movies pass the surface level
  8. Being content with my skill level of drumming
  9. Being good at League of Legends
  10. Having a child both positively (married/ready) and negatively (right now)

Make a list of ten topics you wish you could write about:

  1. Politics
  2. Dating
  3. Music
  4. Movies
  5. Social constructs
  6. Religion
  7. Employment
  8. Race
  9. Sports
  10. Television

Poke a hole in the reality of each of the items listed in this question: Make a list of ten interesting, disturbing, or poignant images or scenes you see throughout your week.

  1. Homeless people: None of these people are homeless. They are wealthy people filming a TV show.
  2. My bank account: It’s actually just counting down how much time I have to live. Getting paid is the only way to stay alive.
  3. My apartment: Prison cell that I believe I have the freedom to come and go as I please. In reality, I’m in a criminally induced coma.
  4. My empty refrigerator: The food eats each other so despite me actually grocery shopping regularly, it stays empty because there is a cannibalistic, Toy Story-esque war going on.
  5. Strangers on the bus: Holograms obviously
  6. Trump tweets: He wrote them all 27 years ago and is releasing them as the become relevant.
  7. World news: The United Nations produces all the news in the world in order to form the opinions of certain countries.
  8. People’s opinions on Twitter: Twitter is actually written in its own language that we haven’t fully grasped. Unpopular opinions are just words that an individual hasn’t learned yet.
  9. Genuine joy on a person’s face: It’s been opposite day since 10-02-2001.
  10. Racism in 2018: Black people are scientifically proven to be from another planet but nobody told them.


Ok that was fun.


Bad Bars: Loophole

Having a crappy day…time for bars

I’ll find a way to get it done even if I have to use a loophole

Sewer rat, I’ll have you living where the poop goes

QB getting pressured out the pocket, you’re gonna have to scoot Foles

Did you hear that Jon’s back? Who, Snow?

My dog eating off this work had to get them a food bowl

Funny guy. Everything that comes from this fool, gold

Peep my chain, no fake shit. It’s full gold.

Girl misunderstands sports. Ball in hoop. Goal.

I’m staying inside. It’s too cold.

There’s no way mom should have known. Who told?

Kitchen got big smells, jew nose.

That’s an oddly colored bird. Is that a blue crow?

Time to clock this boy. Hugo.


Whatever this sucks. Listen to this song I love today:



via Daily Prompt: Loophole

Daily Prompt: Evoke

  1. bring or recall to the conscious mind.

I like this word. Aesthetically, it looks cool and the V and K are worth nice points in Scrabble. A huge part of my life is how music evokes emotion, past events or other feelings in people. Whether I’m producing music to create those feelings or listening to have those things brought upon me. If music doesn’t evoke something in you then it’s worthless.

There is a large group of music that instantly transport me back to a certain period of my life. For example, the entire Mars Volta catalog takes me back to high school. I remember I would sit and play Tony Hawk’s Proving Ground 2 for HOURS with Cedric screaming in the background. To this day, whenever I hear the break near the beginning of “Cicatriz ESP”, or the intro “Tetragrammaton”, or the second guitar solo from “Goliath” I feel nothing but pure joy and that amazement when I first heard that music.

Another point is when my dad introduced me to St. Vincent during my freshman year of college. I remember listening to “The Strangers” and at first not liking how weird the noisy guitar break near the end of the song…then falling in love with everything Annie Clark put out. Replaying “Human Racing” over and over again. Humming the background vocals to “Laughing With a Mouth of Blood” even though I 1. cannot sing 2. it being way out of my range. The same thing happened when I saw on Youtube that Luke had like “Fools” by The Dodos. Full immersion into ALL of their music. Waiting for them to release new music and being just so happy that each album was consistently great. College was a great time for me when it came to discovering music.

This is a very VERY short list of the music that really made an imprint on me. For whatever reason I don’t listen to this music much because I’m always on the hunt for something new. As I listen to “Black Rainbow” the thoughts rush back of being back at The Edge, thoroughly believing that I had the dopest iPod on the planet. These fucking woodwinds man and that creeping eighth note pulse. Mmmmm. I really would like to talk about all the music that I have strong attachments to. It will be so long but it would be fun to revisit everything.

Music isn’t the only thing that evokes feelings. It’s stuff all around us and the emotions  stick with us the most.


Evoke is only two syllables so you are spared from the rapping today.



via Daily Prompt: Evoke

Bad Bars: Viable

This Bad Bars thing will begin randomly showing up more often. It’s fun and gets my brain working. I’m focusing less on the past and just trying to have fun. If something comes up and I really wanna talk about it obviously I’ll still talk about it.

In the mean time, let’s get to these #BARS *Hip Hop Air Horns*

Your plan will not work, those ideas are not viable

I’ll drag you on a string, your ass is way too kiteable

Buying fabric for this livestock, the bill is sizeable

Fit this cow for a dress, that’s how you size a bull

My stock rose so fast, the speed is citeable

Cattle running through my vision when sight a bull

You got them good ankles but let me see what them thighs’ll do

I hate books! I’m taking pages, covers and the title too

You’ll get killed in the first season like Giles’ boo

Whole team moonwalking, we’re Micheal’s crew

Liquidation sale, everything’s buyable

Got all these white tees, them things are dyeable

You all bent outta shape, your attitude is pliable

Wow, this plane is great. I bet it’s flyable

We can take our beef to the sky, that’s how you fly a bull

Way outta shape. You can run how many miles? Two



via Daily Prompt: Viable


I’ve been burned multiple times by not making reservations. The most recent time was at this place call Pinefish. That was a little embarrassing but good thing there was a dope restaurant right across the street. I don’t know why I sometimes just assume shit will be available. “There’s a million restaurants in this giant city, there is no way this particular one is crowded.” Wrong most of the time. I remember someone being like, “Yeah, I’m sure you need a reservation on Friday at a place in center city.” So obvious, I’m so dumb. They aren’t even hard to make because you can just go online and do it for the most part. Couple years back for Valentine’s Day, I made a reservation for this place (RIP Blue Cat) for sometime in the afternoon. We got there and the place was empty. I didn’t say anything and just let the Maître d just seat us. If that would have happened now I would have said something just as a joke.

I’m sorry for what’s about to happen:

Send you home in the end (indian) like reservation

My home is a one stop shop of fun, call it a pleasure station

Doctor of one, She gon test her patient.

Clergy got an accent. Is your pastor Haitian?

I’m rude and I hate greetings. I’m never wavin’

Breakfast time, do you want eggs or bacon?

Sick boy, make sure those meds are taken

Shoes on the sheets like the beds are pavement

You country is trash, I come from a better nation

You don’t even flow with these pearls, you know how much Vedder’s makin?

OK that’s enough. 



via Daily Prompt: Reservation


If you follow this blog with any sort of regularity you know that I grew up in church. Many times people will say that people are “called” to something. For example, say it is discovered that you have a decent singing voice.  People will then say that God has called you to sing to the masses, spreading your light through the gift that God has given you. Depending on how serious you take the religion this can be a daunting task that can be placed on a young person.  In my case, I play the drums and I remember being told that despite the music I could be playing that someone would see something different in me. In a roundabout way I could change someone’s life by performing. For whatever reason, this has stuck with me. At this point, I love playing music and the biggest struggle I have is whether or not I should pursue it full time. Why do I play music? Not only is it cathartic but I do it so others can find at least a little happiness while I’m performing. That’s why in recent years it’s been reeeally hard to appreciate the level that I’m at. There is a nagging that I should be much better. I have to find a way to practice more. Get better so I can not only be happy with myself, possibly make it a viable career and have more impact. Petty excuses and errant desires have gotten in the way but honestly, the responsibility falls on me. The other thought I have is maybe I’m called to do something else. Drumming could just be a hobby and I’m meant to contribute to the world in a different way.


via Daily Prompt: Calling