95% of this story is true
Justin wakes up at 6 a.m. sharp on a Saturday morning. A little groggy and a slight headache from the drinking last night. “That was a weird dream,” he thinks to himself.
The girl in his bed is still very knocked out. She smells nice. He shifts a little because his arm is definitely asleep from being used as a pillow. In his experience, as a guy, you don’t really get great sleep when cuddling unless you are used to that person’s body. After realizing that his whole body pretty much needed to move, he turns to become the big spoon the world needs.
What the fuck was that?
His whole right leg felt sopping wet. Justin panicked. So there are only two options. Either I peed the bed (He’s spent everyday since the middle of 7th grade to avoid ever doing this again) or she peed the bed (THIS HAS HAPPENED BEFORE….TWICE-not her, two different girls).
Well, this morning just got real bad.
First, check to see if it’s actually real. He reaches down to the space where his thigh meets hers. Yup it’s wet. *shudders* Next, can you smell the pee? Nope. Well that’s good but he’s not done. He checks his whole crotch area. It’s not wet, there is no trail of sadness. Justin inhales because he knows this will be the creepy part. It was the first date and they kind of fooled around but didn’t have sex. She probably wouldn’t mind that he was touching her but would mind the reason. Don’t wake up, don’t wake up, don’t wake up,” he chanted to himself as he touched her butt and then inner thigh. Once again, dry and no piss road. So it seemed to be an isolated incident because the bed was also dry. The conclusion was that it was just sweat from two thick-thighed people being in contact with each other in warm weather. “Oh, Thank God,” he exhales audibly. He wipes the sweat from his leg, checks his phone (obviously nothing there) and slots himself right behind the girl that has surprisingly stayed asleep the whole time. She will be wistfully unaware that I nearly freaked out and that we narrowly avoided guaranteed embarrassment for both of us.
“Nice morning wood,” she whispers coyly, easing ever so slightly into him.